Kayfabe Trump: Faking Tough

Former President Donald Trump likes to posture as a tough guy, and that’s how his admirers see him, but it’s fake, all kayfabe.

Kayfabe is a term from professional wrestling that refers to the portrayal of events, characters, and storylines as real, even though they are scripted or staged to preserve the illusion of authenticity for the audience, and it perfectly describes Trump’s style. Trump doesn’t care whether it’s true or not, as long as he can convince the rubes it really happened.

This particular illusion starts with a tweet (it’s always a tweet) from Konstantin Kisin, a podcaster and writer who is well-known in the heterodox community.¹ Kisin calls himself “non-partisan,” but like many heterodox types, he’s been leaning in a right-ish direction, although Kisin, as a citizen of the UK, will not be voting in American elections.

In his tweet, Kisin argues that Trump is preferable from a “geopolitical perspective” because “the world only respects one thing: strength,” and he quote-tweets a video to prove his point.

Except the video that supposedly shows Trump’s strength is a lie, kayfabe, a fantasy of invented virility.

Kisin’s shared video starts with a brief clip from the debate that has Trump saying:

He said why do you send me a picture of my house, I said, “You’re going to have to figure that out Abdul,” and for eighteen months we had nobody killed.

Impressive! Trump threatened “Abdul,” and Americans stayed safe. (Only it didn’t happen.)

The video then cuts to a longer clip from a July 2024 Sage Steele² interview with Republican Congressman Wesley Hunt (Texas) and Republican Congressman Byron Donalds (Florida). In the clip (at the 43-minute mark), Hunt tells a more dramatic version of that Trump story.

I’m going to give you my favorite President Trump story. My number one favorite of all time. When we were negotiating with the Taliban, while President Trump was still the president, the president wanted to get out of Afghanistan, but he wanted a conditions-based withdrawal, meaning that you do what we tell you to do, and then we’ll start pulling troops back slowly as long as you abide by our rules. It's President Trump and Mike Pompeo, and they’re talking to Taliban leadership in the room, and they have one translator in the room. President Trump looked at the Taliban leader and said this, “I want to leave Afghanistan, but it’s going to be a conditions-based withdrawal,” and the translator translated, and he said, “If you harm the hair on a single American, I’m going to kill you,” and the translator goes, [Hunt mimes a shocked expression], and Trump goes “Tell him, tell him what I said,” and he reached in his pocket, pulled out a satellite photo of the leader of the Taliban’s home, and handed it to him, and got up and walked out of the room. [exclamations of amazement] Do you know not a single American was killed for 18 months? That’s the definition of strength. That’s what I’m talking about.

Wow, that’s tough and manly. I can see why Kisin was impressed. Trump kicking ass and showing photos!

Except it never happened.

The minute I listened to Hunt’s story, I knew it didn’t pass the smell test. Michael Bay wouldn’t write dialogue that obvious. “If you harm the hair on a single American, I’m going to kill you”? Trump having a photo in his pocket? Handing it to the guy and walking out? I can imagine the shot in the movie, but the real world isn’t a James Cameron film. Hunt’s story is cartoonishly bad.

And untrue. There was no threat, no photo, and Trump never met with Taliban leadership.

So what did happen?

A tentative plan for Trump to meet with Taliban leaders at Camp David had been discussed in August and September 2019, but it fell through. A full peace deal was later negotiated and signed in Doha, Qatar, on February 29, 2020. A macho Trump was not there. The deal was signed by stodgy American diplomat Zalmay Khalilzad.

State Department photo by Ron Przysucha

A few days later, on March 2, Trump did speak by phone to Mullah Abdul Ghani Baradar, a top Taliban official and negotiator, still in Qatar. There was no mention in the news of any threats or photos. Instead, Trump sounded conciliatory.

Two days later, Trump called Baradar. According to an official who listened to the exchange, Trump told him, “You guys are tough fighters.” Then Trump asked, “Do you need something from me?”

“We need to get prisoners released,” Baradar said, adding that he had heard Ghani would not coöperate. Trump said that he would tell Pompeo to press Ghani.³

Trump never went to Qatar. Baradar never went to Washington.

A year later, Trump’s kayfabe started to reshape that conversation with Baradar.

In July 2021, speaking to a crowd of Arizona supporters, Trump suddenly claimed to have threatened a Taliban leader. As recounted by The Huffington Post, Trump said:

“let’s call him Mohammed” — who Trump characterized as speaking entirely in grunts. The former president recalled threatening “your village, where I know you are,” in a call with the leader. “That’s going to be the point at which the first bombs drop.”

In August 2021, in a conversation with talk radio host Hugh Hewitt, Trump added details to his tale, saying he told the Afghan leader that America would

“hit you harder than anybody has ever been hit in world history…I believe I repeated the name of his town,” Trump told Hewitt. “‘That will be the first place that we start. And I won’t be able to speak to you anymore after that, and isn’t that a very sad thing?’ But that is the story.”

“I believe I repeated the name of his town.” You can hear Trump making it up as he goes along. Note that there is still no mention of a photo.

The photo arrives a year later, in a September 2022 interview with Fox News’s Sean Hannity (quote from The Huffington Post).

Hannity: “Didn’t you at one point tell him, ‘I know exactly where you are,’ and give him the exact coordinates where he was?”

“No, I sent him a picture of his house,” the former president claimed. “He said, ‘But why, but why, do you send me a picture of my house?’ I said, ‘You’ll have to figure that out.’”

This is the version of the story that Trump told in his debate with Kamala Harris.

Finally, in July 2024, Congressman Hunt recounted his “number one favorite Trump story” that actually puts the two men in the room together, and Trump’s “sent” photo became Congressman Hunt’s “handed” to him photo. A fantastical story had steadily evolved and became even more outlandish, making Trump sound even more manly. Hunt’s implausible tale was the one that impressed Konstantine Kisin.

I don’t know if Hunt actually heard this story from someone (Trump?) or just made it up himself. Neither option reflects well on the congressman—either he’s a fool or a shameless fraud—but I’m sure Trump didn’t mind. It’s all kayfabe.

To be fair to Trump, his own fake story doesn’t have Trump and “Abdul” in the same room.

DAVID MUIR: Vice President Harris, thank you. President Trump, your response to her saying that you began the negotiations with the Taliban.

FORMER PRESIDENT DONALD TRUMP: Yeah, thank you. So if you take a look at that period of time, the Taliban was killing our soldiers, a lot of them, with snipers. And I got involved with the Taliban because the Taliban was doing the killing. That's the fighting force within Afghanistan. They don't bother doing that because you know, they deal with the wrong people all the time. But I got involved. And Abdul is the head of the Taliban.⁴ He is still the head of the Taliban. And I told Abdul don't do it anymore, you do it anymore you're going to have problems. And he said why do you send me a picture of my house? I said you're going to have to figure that out, Abdul. And for 18 months we had nobody killed.

Again, look at how the story developed. In 2020, we have a normal diplomatic phone call. In 2021, Trump ‘remembered’ threatening to bomb someone’s home, and this quickly evolved into a more specific threat where Trump had probably shared the name of the man’s hometown. Then, in 2022, Trump tells us that a photo had been sent (via email? special courier?) to intimidate “Abdul,” the story he repeated at the debate with Harris. Finally, in 2024, we hear a Trump supporter making up an even more elaborate and ridiculous myth of Trump looking the leader of the Taliban in the eye and threatening to kill him.⁵

Trump fans bought those lies hook, line, and sinker. And continue to buy them. Many will support Trump because fake stories like this have convinced them that he’s a strong leader who can intimidate dangerous men.

If Trump becomes president again, will he be firm in international negotiations? I can’t know, but I’m sure Imaginary Trump will stand tall. He’ll clench his jaw like Schwarzenegger and narrow his eyes like Eastwood. Perhaps he’ll claim to have roughed up world leaders with slaps, gut punches, clotheslines, or body slams.⁶ Who can predict how far the kayfabe will go?

I realize this essay won’t change anyone’s mind. Even if people believe Trump was lying (and the evidence is hard to deny), they’ll rationalize it. “Maybe he didn’t say those exact words, but he still faced down Afghanistan.” (By giving them everything that they wanted.) Or convince themselves it doesn’t matter because everyone lies.

But the truth does matter, and America deserves a real leader, not a kayfabe showman. And if you think Kamala Harris is just as bad? Well, at least be honest about who you’re choosing instead.

1. “Heterodox community” is one of the evolving ways people have used to describe thinkers and writers who coalesced around generally anti-woke views. I share some of those anti-woke views and have often agreed with Kisin in the past.

2. Steele is a former ESPN anchor and current podcaster.

3. Ashraf Ghani was the president of the American-backed Afghan government. The government that would be overthrown by the Taliban a year later, partly because of the Trump authorized negotiations with Mullah Abdul Ghani Baradar. Yes, there are two Ghanis in this story.

4. Mullah Abdul Ghani Baradar, the negotiator Trump spoke to, is not and was not the head of the Taliban (who is Mullah Hibatullah Akhundzada). “Baradar” is not Abdul Ghani’s given name but a nickname, meaning “Brother” in Persian.

5. Forget the imaginary death threat. Imagine how much coverage there would have been if Trump had physically met with Taliban leadership. This could not have been kept secret. And Trump’s own (unbelievable) story contradicts Hunt’s version. Anyone believing that Hunt’s story is plausible should be embarrassed.

6. A “Clothesline” is where a wrestler extends their arm and runs into their opponent, knocking them down. A “Body Slam” is where the wrestler lifts their opponent and slams them back-first onto the mat. A “Boston Crab is a submission move where the wrestler bends their opponent’s legs backward while sitting on their back, applying pressure to the spine. The last one is not in my text, but I thought my readers should know.